Wives Tales are Dumb

Of course there are a lot of very dumb wives tales because people are superstitious dummies.

 

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Apparently this scripture stops bleeding: And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in  thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.

We tried it and it did not work at all. This one is just cray religious people. Saying a bunch of words won’t make anything happen if you’re profusely bleeding. Please don’t use this and kill someone because you’re too stupid to call a doctor. Think about your actions.

 

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The last to leave a graveyard after a funeral is destined to be the next to die.

The morbid version of catching the wedding bouquet! Hooray!

 

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Never cut a babies nails before they’re a year old, bite them off. If you cut them off, the baby will grow up to steal.

This one is just completely absurd. Don’t bite your babies nails. Please.

 

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If a cold chill runs down your spine, a rabbit just ran over your future grave.

Um? Why does this one even need to exist? It’s so weirdly specific. How is this useful to anyone. I think you’re just cold. Go home, put on a sweater, and stop babbling about rabbits and your future grave.

 

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If a mother ends up marking her child through pregnancy with a birth mark in the shape of what frightened her or scared her, she can lick the mark for nine mornings in a row and it will disappear as the child grows.

Don’t lick your child. Just don’t. 

 

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Place a woman’s menstrual cloth in a bird’s nest and she’ll go mad and crazy.

Mkay… Again why is this useful? I guess if you needed to like make someone go cray for some revenge plot this could be useful. But what happens to the birds who’s nest you put the menstrual cloth in? Like, their nest now has a bloody rag in it. Poor birds.

 

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To get rid of warts, steal someone’s dishcloth and bury it, the warts will disappear. This one also doesn’t work and why would it! 

 

In conclusion, wives tales suck and are for weird people who lick babies.

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